You know how tabloids have those shots that are celebrities at the grocery store? And they always wear big glasses, and have one article of clothing that makes them look like they're not a complete slob? Yeah. I'm rocking that look today. Aviators, messy bun with a giant headband, eight-year-old ballet flats, jeans from the dirty clothes bin, a white Haines undershirt with a beater underneath--and an adorable scarf.
I'm working on making workplace violence training packets, and the stapler shot a stable at my eye. Clearly, this is a violent workplace.
A resident of mine told me that he doesn't wear condoms because they decrease sensitivity. My reponse? "You know what else decreases sensitivity? Herpes."
I'm the most gaseous person I know. But coffee burps are more professional than beer burps. And champagne burps--those are just classy.
